14 February 2010
A/N | I don't normally blog like this but I was inspired by the profane yet wicked language of my barmy Brit mates. Hahah. Oh and I may have written this in 1st person POV but it doesn't necessarily mean that I'm the one being depicted in this senseless shower of thoughts. Don't assume. Don't judge.
Count the number of times I wrote "fuck" and "dude" if you're that bored.
Fuck. It's so hot! I took out my iTouch and decided to go through some notes... Shit! My KFC fries are all soggy now. Good thing this HotShots saved my fucking *hungry-to-death* day!
Wait. Interesting note I have right here: "I hate Valentine's Day". No fucking bollocks.
All of a sudden, someone takes a seat next to me. Do you really have to sit this fucking close to me!? G'sakes! It's mad hot already. Where are the rain dancers when you need them?
People kept coming into our jeepney. Yea, our jeepney. Because I've been fucking sitting here all the way from the terminal. It's been twenty minutes and both my head and my arse are fucking grilled now. Twenty-fucking-minutes of putting my fingers in and out of this KFC HotShots box of awesomeness and twenty-fucking-minutes of pretending I'm entertained by my iTouch. I need a beer. A can of Heineken, to be exact.
This person next to me... Poor dude. He's been handing in other passengers' fares to the driver for over 10 minutes now. Give the dude a fucking break! Dude has no fucking choice though. By now, you may have noticed that I named this person, Dude.
No, really. Poor Dude. Have some fucking mercy, will you? Dude has got some fantastic patience and self-control. No complaining or grunting heard yet. I'm quite impressed.
Hmmm... Dude has got nice hair. Nice scent too. But damn it's still so fucking hot and I'm still damn bored. I need to sprinkle this oven-like day some spice! Perhaps throw a fucking bowl of spice in!
A little less than five minutes 'til destination. What to do... What to do? Do what you're friggin' good at! Alright. Poor Dude sitting next to me, I wanna start a game.
And poor Dude, you are my fucking victim. Lo siento.
Dude passed on yet another fare to the driver. A passenger is waiting for his change... The driver stretched out his right hand backwards to return change. I grabbed it quickly just seconds before Dude. I have mercy. Or let me show some mercy. I still have a heart, y'know.
-- Perhaps you've been a bit taken aback by my sudden show of compassion. I like that. I try to hide the smirk on my face. Back to the scene --
I took the change from the driver and slowly, carefully moved my hand to find his. Slowly and carefully, one by one, I handed Dude the change. Skin to skin. I can feel the tension now. I'm making him really nervous. I'm absolutely loving this! He felt it too. He's turned awkward, truth be told. Dude indeed fucking felt it! Welcome to the game, Player 2.
Round 1. Fight! I bit my lower lip. Hoping Dude won't notice me struggling to keep myself from smiling. I failed as a half-smile escaped from my face. Boo me!
"Don't Jedi mind-trick me." I can somehow read his thoughts. After all, I'm the Queen of Fucking Mind Games, innit? His movements are starting to bother me now. Dude's nerves are betraying him. I do kick arse in this game. Whizzer!
I bet Dude's fucking racking his brain right about now. I can feel his eyes boring into me. He's probably thinking, "What the hell does she want?" Perhaps Dude wants some answers. A legit response. A wink or a smile, at least. 3 Combo Hit! I gave him neither. I rummaged through my gym bag to look for my phone... Checked 4 unread messages. Too lazy to reply. So much for my fake apathy. I need to strike more. More action. Fucking hot and boring.
A glance sideways in Dude's direction... Fuck! Dude's squirming and sweating. I'm not sure if it's the weather or this fucking tension from this game we're playing.
Time remaining: 45 seconds
I can't pretend anymore! It's time for the Finishing Move - my killer stare! I said 'stare', NOT glare! Bam! Hot! -- Both Dude and the weather. So fucking nice and fucking hot. It's the clash of spark-filled stares. Then I looked away. K.O.! Player 1 Wins! I turned to the driver and asked him to stop. I got off the jeepney with an uppish smile.
Dude's left inside sitting with a questioning look. His eyes squinting. I may be the first one to leave but I fucking won. Chuckling, I hop-skipped towards the waiting shed and gave my boyfriend the biggest kiss.
Game Over.
***************************************************
Whew. That was an awful lot of fuck. LOL
Count the number of times I wrote "fuck" and "dude" if you're that bored.
o O o
Riding on this jeepney, seems like people are seated too far away from me. Do I look that fucking scary? I can see from the corner of my eye, creepy stares from afar.Fuck. It's so hot! I took out my iTouch and decided to go through some notes... Shit! My KFC fries are all soggy now. Good thing this HotShots saved my fucking *hungry-to-death* day!
Wait. Interesting note I have right here: "I hate Valentine's Day". No fucking bollocks.
All of a sudden, someone takes a seat next to me. Do you really have to sit this fucking close to me!? G'sakes! It's mad hot already. Where are the rain dancers when you need them?
People kept coming into our jeepney. Yea, our jeepney. Because I've been fucking sitting here all the way from the terminal. It's been twenty minutes and both my head and my arse are fucking grilled now. Twenty-fucking-minutes of putting my fingers in and out of this KFC HotShots box of awesomeness and twenty-fucking-minutes of pretending I'm entertained by my iTouch. I need a beer. A can of Heineken, to be exact.
This person next to me... Poor dude. He's been handing in other passengers' fares to the driver for over 10 minutes now. Give the dude a fucking break! Dude has no fucking choice though. By now, you may have noticed that I named this person, Dude.
No, really. Poor Dude. Have some fucking mercy, will you? Dude has got some fantastic patience and self-control. No complaining or grunting heard yet. I'm quite impressed.
Hmmm... Dude has got nice hair. Nice scent too. But damn it's still so fucking hot and I'm still damn bored. I need to sprinkle this oven-like day some spice! Perhaps throw a fucking bowl of spice in!
A little less than five minutes 'til destination. What to do... What to do? Do what you're friggin' good at! Alright. Poor Dude sitting next to me, I wanna start a game.
And poor Dude, you are my fucking victim. Lo siento.
Dude passed on yet another fare to the driver. A passenger is waiting for his change... The driver stretched out his right hand backwards to return change. I grabbed it quickly just seconds before Dude. I have mercy. Or let me show some mercy. I still have a heart, y'know.
-- Perhaps you've been a bit taken aback by my sudden show of compassion. I like that. I try to hide the smirk on my face. Back to the scene --
I took the change from the driver and slowly, carefully moved my hand to find his. Slowly and carefully, one by one, I handed Dude the change. Skin to skin. I can feel the tension now. I'm making him really nervous. I'm absolutely loving this! He felt it too. He's turned awkward, truth be told. Dude indeed fucking felt it! Welcome to the game, Player 2.
Round 1. Fight! I bit my lower lip. Hoping Dude won't notice me struggling to keep myself from smiling. I failed as a half-smile escaped from my face. Boo me!
"Don't Jedi mind-trick me." I can somehow read his thoughts. After all, I'm the Queen of Fucking Mind Games, innit? His movements are starting to bother me now. Dude's nerves are betraying him. I do kick arse in this game. Whizzer!
I bet Dude's fucking racking his brain right about now. I can feel his eyes boring into me. He's probably thinking, "What the hell does she want?" Perhaps Dude wants some answers. A legit response. A wink or a smile, at least. 3 Combo Hit! I gave him neither. I rummaged through my gym bag to look for my phone... Checked 4 unread messages. Too lazy to reply. So much for my fake apathy. I need to strike more. More action. Fucking hot and boring.
A glance sideways in Dude's direction... Fuck! Dude's squirming and sweating. I'm not sure if it's the weather or this fucking tension from this game we're playing.
Time remaining: 45 seconds
I can't pretend anymore! It's time for the Finishing Move - my killer stare! I said 'stare', NOT glare! Bam! Hot! -- Both Dude and the weather. So fucking nice and fucking hot. It's the clash of spark-filled stares. Then I looked away. K.O.! Player 1 Wins! I turned to the driver and asked him to stop. I got off the jeepney with an uppish smile.
Dude's left inside sitting with a questioning look. His eyes squinting. I may be the first one to leave but I fucking won. Chuckling, I hop-skipped towards the waiting shed and gave my boyfriend the biggest kiss.
Game Over.
***************************************************
Whew. That was an awful lot of fuck. LOL
Labels: Do Ask Do Tell
3 Comments:
-
- BdfSeller said...
10.3.10Wow. That's what I'm talking about.- Anonymous said...
18.3.10HAIL!!!!!!!!!- DanaDaDiva said...
5.5.10THANK YOU VERY MUCH. *curtsies*
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
